4 Signs of Postpartum Depression in Men
PPD occurs in
8 to 10% of fathers…
But it can look a little different in men than it does in women.
We teach boys that it is not OK to cry or be sensitive, but it is acceptable to show anger and aggression. We also expect men to be providers and protectors so it feels more acceptable to withdraw into work than it does to stay in bed all day. The influence of these expectations can lead to a presentation of depression that is often misinterpreted as fathers being uninterested or disengaged with the baby.
Here are four signs your partner or friend may be struggling with postpartum depression.
1. Irritability and Anger
He has a short fuse and seems to get annoyed over small things. He becomes frustrated easily. His temper may be directed at the baby, other kids, his partner, the dog, colleagues, you name it. He may turn this anger inward and that brings us to #2…
2.Feelings of Worthlessness
“There’s nothing I can do for the baby. She doesn’t want me, she wants you.” He may feel useless as a father. He doesn’t know what to do to soothe the baby. He doesn’t know what the baby needs. He feels incompetent and worthless. He may say things like “I’m just not good at this” or “I can’t do this.” These feelings can manifest into avoidant behaviors such as passing the baby off whenever she cries. Speaking of avoidance…
3. Withdrawal
He’s spending long hours at work and doesn’t seem to want to be around the family. When he is at home he’s spending a lot of time playing video games, working outside, or spending time in the garage. When he does spend time with the baby he’s on his phone or watching TV and doesn’t seem engaged. Another way he may be withdrawing is…
4. Substance Abuse
He has begun drinking or smoking more than usual and sometimes he even does so in secret. It seems like he may be using alcohol or other substances as a coping tool for stress or as a form of avoidance.
Other signs of depression include loss of motivation, low mood, low energy, difficulty concentrating, significant changes in weight, inability to sleep or increased need for sleep, decreased interest in activities, and recurrent thoughts of suicide or death.
Thoughts of suicide or self harm should always be taken seriously.
If you are located in New Mexico and are concerned about yourself or your partner, reach out for a free consultation. If you are located elsewhere, check out Psychology Today or the Postpartum Support International provider directory to look for a therapist in your city.
